No matter how old you get or what your situation, you may find that you need to move back in with your parents. Perhaps you've lost your job or moved back to your hometown to pursue a new employment opportunity. You might have decided to move back to save money for a house deposit or care for your parents in their old age. Whatever your circumstances, the transition from independent living to life back with Mum and Dad can be challenging. However, adjusting to your new living arrangement can be easier on everybody if you keep these tips in mind.
1. Be Kind to Your Parents
Chances are that you're moving back home because it makes more financial sense than living on your own. Even if you're moving in with your parents to help care for them, they're still providing you with a roof over your head that costs less than rent or your own mortgage. So whatever your circumstances, there are reasons to be grateful to your parents. After all, they're sacrificing their independence and privacy just as you are, so it's crucial you treat them right.
Keep those reasons in the front of your mind, and you'll find it easier to keep cool when conflicts inevitably arise. Remember that your parents always deserve your respect and address them accordingly, even if they are getting on your nerves. Thank them when they help you out, and go out of your way to return the favour.
2. Keep Your Parents Informed
When you live independently, your life is your own. You can make plans to have drinks with your colleagues after work on a whim and stay out all night at a wild party. But psychologist Susan Newman, Ph.D, the author of "Under One Roof Again: All Grown Up and (Re)learning to Live Together Happily," says life should change when you move back in with Mum and Dad. It might feel a little high school to keep your parents informed of your whereabouts, but they're bound to worry if you're not home when expected. Mum's also not going to be pleased if she makes you dinner and you don't turn up to eat it.
This doesn't mean you have to live the life of a monk when you're living with your parents. Most parents will be happy to have some alone time while you enjoy yourself. Just be considerate and keep them in the loop when you're making plans, and if those plans change.
3. Pitch in as an Adult
It's very easy to revert to childlike behaviours when you're back living with Mum and Dad. However, it's important to remember that you're returning to your childhood home as an adult capable of taking on adult responsibilities. Your Mum might have washed your clothes while you lazed on the lounge as a kid, but you shouldn't assume she wants to wade through your stinky socks now. She definitely doesn't want to have more jobs to do because you're leaving wet towels on the floor or possessions around the place.
Offer to clean the house, cook family meals, and perform other household chores. Depending on your schedule, you might like to take on the lion's share as thanks for the roof over your head. Chat with your parents to ensure you're not taking over their preferred jobs, and consider creating a roster to ensure everything gets done.
Many household expenses increase as the family grows, so help out financially if your situation allows. You may like to pay a weekly amount of rent, buy groceries now and again, or come to some other arrangement that suits you all.
4. Book a Storage Unit
Your parents' home is likely to be very crowded if it has to accommodate all of your possessions as well as their own. Consider what you really need to move into your home, and book a storage unit to house the rest. Good storage facilities keep your precious items in dust-free, pest-free environments, so they're as good as you left them when you're ready to live independently again.
5. Plan a Return to Independent Living
Unless you're moving back home to care for ailing parents, living with Mum and Dad is temporary. Discuss what will need to occur for you to move out and ensure you're keeping up your end of the bargain.
If you're at home because it's easier to save for a house deposit, commit to setting aside a regular amount of each paycheque to help your savings grow. If unemployment has sent you back to Mum and Dad's, commit to applying for as many jobs as you can, networking, and even consider upskilling to land a new position. If you're simply looking for a new place to live, make sure you spend time inspecting properties and lodging applications.
Whatever you need to do to return to independent living, make sure that you make a consistent effort to make it happen. Watching you sleep until noon, play video games, or spend days in front of the idiot box will quickly grate on even the most understanding of parents. Make sure that you're sticking to your plan to keep harmony in your Mum and Dad's home.
Whether it's a short-term arrangement or you're planning to stay for much longer, these tips will help you all adjust to living back with your parents. When you're ready to make the move, call Chess Moving to ensure the process runs smoothly and without stress.